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Wednesday, September 21, 2005

The Unwritten Sidewalk Rule

I hate to use this site as a sounding board for my own personal whinginess (like every other mediocre blog in the free world), so please forgive me while this post degenerates into little more than a moany gripe today. And for all the sex killings.

Even though we're well into September, Boston's sidewalks are still teeming with tourists and will be for some time. As a result, navigating my daily walk to and from the Theatre District from my home in the North End can be nothing short of infuriating. I bite my cheek and remind myself that one day I'll live in the country.

But there's one particular irk I just can't stifle - and that's the myriad of daily portages I am forced to make around people who go against the grain on the city's sidewalks. My perception is thus - a sidewalk can be considered a highway for people on which one should keep to their right as much as possible. If they fail to do so, they should be 'chin-checked' or, at the very least slapped with a whale cock. But this hasn't been festering for a long time or anything.

If I went to Scotland, rented a car and started zipping around on the wrong side of the road, I'd eventually be arrested or even killed in a head-on collision. But it's not just tourists that careen all over the bustling walkways - there are plenty of native bumpkins and simple idiots who do it too. So am I a lunatic, or is this wrong-side-of-the-sidewalk grievance something that many others share? I am genuinely curious.



6 Comments:

Blogger Jennie SMASH! said...

Pfff. Come to New York.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005 3:05:00 PM  
Blogger Jenn M. said...

The general consensus seems to be that you always keep to the right, no matter which way you are headed. I never really thought about it until my stepmother commented one day about how she couldn't believe how many people don't seem to know that in Boston. And she's from Pennsylvania.

I generally try to stick to the "keep right" rule but I will make exceptions if the person(s) heading towards me are a) really old and not able to move as quickly as I can. b) really really young. c) Emerson students, (who don't seem to be aware of anything beyond how brilliant and witty they are) and d) Junkies (who don't seem to know where they are.)
If they meet none of the above criteria, and seem content to wander down the sidewalk like a cow in downtown Mumbai, try the reverse psychology of excessive politeness. Take an exaggerated step around them and say "excuse me" just loud enough for them to hear. And if they don't get it, maybe when they wander into the crosswalk in the mistaken assumption the traffic will actually stop for them, they will get their cosmic comeuppance.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005 3:12:00 PM  
Blogger Dave Pye said...

Smash: That's precisely the sort of reason I DON'T live in New York.

JM: My upstairs work neighbor finally chimes in! Great answer. I'm glad I am not alone.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005 3:37:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought it was generally accepted that you walk to the same side of the sidewalk/footpath as the side you drive on.

I too have noticed that people don't walk on the right side though, but I think it's a Boston/ North East thing.

Although my main complaint is people who block escalators. Anywhere else in the world, if you're lazy and don't want to walk, then you stand to the right... not in Boston.

But then again, those same people who stand on the escalators because they are lazy are the same people who spend 2 hours a day at the gym because they think they are fat. Don't they realize if they actually walked more they wouldn't need to go to the gym...? (Never been, never will.)

/end rant

Friday, September 23, 2005 6:37:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I actually find that Boston people are great at walking in the city - it is the tourists, families, and students that screw it up. Seriously - try living in the midwest where walking is next to nil and driving is king. Yes, everyone walks on the right side... but people are EXTREMELY slow! In Boston you can always find a seam to split and if not then you make one. Plus the roads and sidewalks are a bit screwed up - like that time you slipped in the Haymarket snow Pye and you couldn't get up to save your life. There were little kids crying as you laid turtled on your back. It was like watching a Godzilla movie - you thrashing your arms trying to grip the ice and in the meantime you are whipping out little asian ladies and children.

Friday, September 23, 2005 9:10:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Funny how whenever I post I kill the conversation.

Saturday, September 24, 2005 6:52:00 AM  
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