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Thursday, May 05, 2005

Monkey Brains, Cow Pee - Now We Can Eat!

Monday night I was watching Dennis Miller Live and he told a joke that just set me to giggling. The punchline went something like: "That guy has more intestinal fortitude than a Calcutta restaurant critic". I guess you had to be there. But if you have a quick look at this article, I'm sure you'll agree - source material for that sort of humor is as prevalent now as it was back in 1984 when we first watched Indiana Jones and Willie Scott eat chilled monkey brains.



People all over India are now turning to cow urine to cure what ails 'em. The practice is generally frowned upon within families so many folks just grab a bottle from the local cow shelter (goshala), take it to the park and chug it like it was a 40 of O.E. On the D.L.

Cow urine filled my mind, and I came up with a funky rhyme, UGH! Mama never said stop drinking bovine piss, but she would have. I know she would have.



12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

My fiance's family lives on a farm in western NY- we drink cow urine whenever we go home to visit; tasty.

Thursday, May 05, 2005 11:05:00 AM  
Blogger Dave Pye said...

I've got one word for you. And that word is "keeper".

Thursday, May 05, 2005 11:10:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Drinking cow piss is a better alternative to every having to watch Indian Jones and the Temple of Doom again, or having to sit through an agonizing hour of Denis Miller laughing at his own crappy jokes. Come to think of it, drinking Miller Lite also tastes like cow piss. There must be a connection with Denis and piss - oh yeah, he really pisses me off!

Dave, as a preemptive strike to your reply I say, “Bull pucky!”

Thursday, May 05, 2005 11:51:00 AM  
Blogger Dave Pye said...

I'm through pissing in the wind with you, G. I will, however, vehemently defend Temple of Doom. It's nowhere near Raiders in any respect, but still a great and solid movie. Gets a bad wrap. The minecart sequence, the suspension bridge getting sliced in half, the raft sliding off the mountain after falling out of the plane... I could go on, but I don't want to get beaten up on the playground later.

Thursday, May 05, 2005 11:57:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Temple of Doom could have been great, but for the inclusion of that terrible female character. I only hope she screamed as much on the casting couch as she did during that movie.

Dave, you know I always settle my grievances through a game of tether ball and not through violence.

Thursday, May 05, 2005 12:09:00 PM  
Blogger Jennie SMASH! said...

Temple of Doom: Yay. Dennis Miller: Boo.

I'll never understand why you neocon dudes like him so much anyway. He was a frickin' pinko 'til it suited his career.

Thursday, May 05, 2005 12:42:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jennie, I'm glad he left the left because being funny never suited his career.

Thursday, May 05, 2005 12:51:00 PM  
Blogger Jennie SMASH! said...

OK, that's a good point. He's always been a smarmy bastard.

Thursday, May 05, 2005 12:52:00 PM  
Blogger Dave Pye said...

You two should get a room. Then you truly would be 'fucking annoying Liberals'.

Thursday, May 05, 2005 3:18:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, David, how you make me blush. Do you kiss your president’s ass with that mouth?

My lifelong hatred of Dennis Miller has nothing to do with his political bent (it does add fuel to the fire though), but rather it has to do with the fact that he is *not* funny – despite him providing his very own personal laugh track.

Thursday, May 05, 2005 3:38:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No - he kisses his cat with that mouth...
Wait - I shouldn't be throwing stones at glass ships or whatever the feck that saying is.
Cheers Big Ears!

Thursday, May 05, 2005 10:33:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Until it suited his career."

Yeah, Miller has made a MINT since becoming a righty. I mean, from HBO to CNBC!!! What a career move! Because we all know that Hollywood is honeycombed with "neo-cons."

(Explain for us, if you will, how Dave qualifies as a "neo-con." Why not just a "con"? Perhaps a paleo-con? Or is it that "neo-con" has been stripped of all meaning, and is just the chosen pejorative of MoveOn's amen corner?)

Friday, May 06, 2005 11:57:00 AM  
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